On learning to breathe again, with Dr. Andrew Weil and Thich Nhat Hanh

Seventeen months into this worldwide pandemic (if we consider it to have begun in March of 2020) and the world is very stressed. Even if we could bracket off the imminent collapse of our hospital system in Saskatchewan, under the strain of the fourth wave of the Delta variant, everyone who’s honest will admit to feelings of anxiety, exhaustion, burn-out or even panic. These words have passed nearly everyone’s lips, whether to describe their own state of mind or that of their loved ones.

Evidence-based policies and the need for earlier interventions (lockdowns) went ignored by some provincial governments.

Some eligible adults continue to refuse vaccination, while kids under the age of 12 do not yet have that choice and are falling ill. ICU nurses must attend inadequately to two or even three patients at once, whereas in non-Covid times, s/he’d have only one. Daily case counts on the day of writing have reached nearly 500, in Saskatoon alone. Five or more patients in our still relatively small city are dying, daily.

The province is seeing per capita a rate of new cases more than three times the national average; and a death rate of four times that. Important surgeries have been postponed; organ donation suspended. People are lonely and dealing—or dying—with their fears and worries, alone.

And, as medical science tells us, the surge will not end soon.

Those of us who heeded medical science and sought full vaccination continue to follow Covid protocol (masking up, keeping to small bubbles, etc.) while our government refuses to reinstate a much needed lockdown.

Some Covid patients, who are lucky enough to be successfully treated and discharged, must use oxygen at home. As one CBC story detailed, they “have to learn to breathe again.” The province of Ontario has developed a home oxygen therapy program for patients, post-discharge, since their recovery continues for months (or longer) after leaving the hospital.

But those of us who do not contract Covid and so do not need oxygen therapy, also need to remember—or to learn for the first time—how to B-R-E-A-T-H-E.

Integrative Medicine Specialist, Dr. Andrew Weil, who leads the “Center for Integrative Medicine” at the University of Arizona, advocates for the 4-7-8 breathing technique–a simple, efficient exercise that can be done anywhere, in any physical position (although sitting with one’s back straight is best to facilitate air flow).

During a particularly chaotic day for me, recently, I returned to my practice of this exercise and found, within five or six minutes, a noticeably calming effect. The exercise can be done in public spaces (e.g. doctor’s offices, public transit, before public presentations, etc.), although then one might inhibit the “whooshing” sounds of exhalation that Weil recommends.

If you haven’t tried this particular exercise, please try it to deal with pandemic life!  Here are its five, simple steps:

  1. Place the tip of your tongue against the ridge of tissue that lies just behind your upper front teeth and keep it there for the duration of the exercise.
  2. Close your mouth and inhale through your nose to the mental count of four.
  3. Hold your breath for a count of seven.
  4. Exhale completely through your mouth, making a whoosh sound to a count of eight. This is one breath.
  5. Inhale again and repeat the cycle three more times for a total of four breaths.

Weil writes that the tip of one’s tongue should stay in position the whole time and that “exhalation should take twice as long as inhalation. The absolute time you spend on each phase is not important; the ratio of 4:7:8 is important.”

If you’re unaccustomed to breathing deeply and holding your breath, Weil recommends speeding up the exercise, until your strength increases, but keeping to the ratio of 4:7:8 over three cycles.

The goal is to “slow [breathing] down and get used to inhaling and exhaling more and more deeply.”

Of course, this American “physician to the stars” has popularized breathing practices that stem from centuries-old Buddhism. Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh, on whom I have blogged in the past, observes something important for our crisis ridden world: “Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor.”

Feelings and even this pandemic, will pass (or eventually so).  What we can control is how we cope with these things–for which there is no better strategy than breathing.

For further information, including videos of breathing exercises by Weil, and healthy diet and eating that counters inflammation and upset, see his website:  https://www.drweil.com/health-wellness/body-mind-spirit/stress-anxiety/breathing-three-exercises/

And now it’s your turn. Are you breathing deeply through these trying times? Please share your best practices on my “contact” page. I’ll breathe easier by hearing from you!

Tomos Roberts (Tomfoolery) on the world’s need for better leaders and how art reflects that need

As many Canadians watched last evening, Canadians elected another minority parliament with Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

While watching the polls and listening to all of the politicians’ speeches, I was reminded of a recent spoken word poem from the UK’s Tomos Roberts. Referred to as “Dear World Leaders,” it calls for leaders on our planet  to address the dearth of wisdom, insight and ethics so commonly in the news–and to value the arts and artists, as vehicles to communicate those values.

Critics can easily charge Roberts’ (aka Tomfoolery’s) poetry with being idealistic. But he makes a grounded appeal for political leaders to find better vision and demonstrate a greater commitment to ethics than most do.

Copyright(c) “Tomfoolery,” here is his poem:

“Dear World Leaders:

I know your job isn’t easy, and the pressures immense, as you navigate uncertain, unfolding events. 

You ask us to stay in our homes and put on our masks. Well, I come to you now with the simplest of asks.

Just encourage us. Look back through the archives—the most famous of speeches. Shakespeare’s Henry the Fifth, Churchill’s “Fighting on the Beaches,” Martin’s Dream of the children with skin black and white, in a world hand-in-hand who would play and not fight.

They sprung verse from adversity through world movements and war. They used words that when spoken helped the hopeless’ wings to soar.

Right now, these are the speeches that we so need to hear. So our goosebumps stand up and we’re roused from our fear. Look, you can tell us of cases, ‘til we’re blue in the faces. We all know the dangers, but the whole human race is, in this moment, confronted with the very same foe.

And you were chosen to guide us all through the unknown, so we hang on your message when things slip and decline. Connected only by screen, we share statements online. But we’re stuck on one narrative and it’s always alarmist. So a word to the wise: don’t discourage the artists.

We need the creativity of people more than ever right now. Call upon them to reforge the old stories of how–we inspire the youth and look after the old, or bring peace to the tired, as they shoulder their load.

Look, if you’re an elected world leader then that surely implies we need more than polite please to “just stay inside.” It’s so disheartening to feel like these words are in vain, when such talented people are told to retrain.

You have dancers, comedians, poets galore. There are actors, musicians, filmmakers and more.

And while key workers are working themselves to the bone, and when weary and drained they must find their way home. What words of encouragement ring out in their minds, what strength for tomorrow do you want them to find?

We need plays to be written and songs to be sung, we need solidarity now so we might overcome.

It’s an emergency but not just the medical kind; ‘cause it pervades through our spirits, our hearts and our minds.

Where’s the passionate speeches that I have not heard, to encourage gives courage—that’s why it’s part of the word.

The last thing I want you to hear in this rhyme is that one day together we’ll look back at this time.

We will collectively mourn those the virus has taken. There’ll be businesses broken and livelihoods shaken. But I’d wager right now that our spark will return and those embers will ignite a new beacon that burns.

But what of you, I do ask. What will your legacy be? What will the history books read; what will you want us to see? Inspire us now and we’ll remember your name. We’ll remember how you answered the call when it came.

Kids will quote you in essays, as they remember this strife, we’ll make toasts to your word; they’ll make films of your life.

So the gauntlet is laid, take it up, if you dare: with intelligence, empathy, wisdom and care.

Just give us something to cling to; encouraging words we may heed.

I hope you’ll be that world leader; that’s the world leader we need.”

© written, directed and read by Tomfoolery: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXKT04MGIzo

 

 

On Wanting to Change–a Meditation on Entrepreneurship from Brianna Wiest

In 2020, Anthony Hopkins received an Oscar nomination for his role in “The Father,” as a man with dementia struggling for control with his daughter, played by Olivia Colman. (The film was featured at the Toronto International Film Festival last year.) Hopkins commented that the film was his personal favourite, following astonishing performances in such earlier films as “The Remains of the Day”  and “Silence of the Lambs.”

Hopkins himself has been diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome and in an interview with the CBC”s Tom Power (during TIFF)  spoke with characteristic humility about the film and about aging.

https://www.cbc.ca/listen/live-radio/1-50-q/clip/15797845-anthony-hopkins-the-father-challenges-growing-older

Over the last few years, the essay I post below has been attributed to him.

Like so much on social media, the attribution is incorrect. (As readers well know, over the years powerful epigraphs have been misattributed all over the internet.  For instance,  I remember several associated with the Dalai Lama which were not his, and that only scratches the surface.) Snopes.com attributes the  essay associated with Hopkins to writer Brianna Wiest:

(https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/anthony-hopkins-let-go/)

While we could debate the problems of misattributed writing forever (remember when it was new to question Shakespeare’s authorship?), Wiest’s essay warrants reading, especially given the  attention recently devoted to the role of boundaries in entrepreneurial relationships. The essay speaks (allegorically) to those and not only to romantic relationships. It could better be called, “On Wanting to Change.”

“I Need This In My Life” (Brianna Wiest)

′′Let go [of] the people who are not prepared to love you. This is the hardest thing you will have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing. Stop having hard conversations with people who don’t want change.

Stop showing up for people who have no interest in your presence. I know your instinct is to do everything to earn the appreciation of those around you, but it’s a boost that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.

When you begin to fight for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you in this place. This doesn’t mean you need to change what you are, it means you should let go of the people who aren’t ready to accompany you.

If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you don’t do yourself a favor by continuing to offer your energy and your life. The truth is that you are not for everyone and not everyone is for you.

That’s what makes it so special when you meet people who reciprocate love. You will know how precious you are.

The more time you spend trying to make yourself loved by someone who is unable to, the more time you waste depriving yourself of the possibility of this connection to someone else.

There are billions of people on this planet and many of them will meet with you at your level of interest and commitment.

The more you stay involved with people who use you as a pillow, a background option or a therapist for emotional healing, the longer you stay away from the community you want.

Maybe if you stop showing up, you won’t be wanted. Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship will end. Maybe if you stop texting, your phone will stay dark for weeks. That doesn’t mean you ruined the relationship, it means the only thing holding it back was the energy that only you gave to keep it. This is not love, it’s attachment. It’s wanting to give a chance to those who don’t deserve it. You deserve so much, there are people who should not be in your life.

The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy, and both are limited.

When you give your time and energy, it will define your existence.

When you realize this, you begin to understand why you are so anxious when you spend time with people, in activities, places or situations that don’t suit you and shouldn’t be around you, your energy is stolen.

You will begin to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and for everyone around you is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else. Make your life a safe haven, in which only ‘compatible′ people are allowed.

You are not responsible for saving anyone. You are not responsible for convincing them to improve. It’s not your work to exist for people and give your life to them! If you feel bad, if you feel compelled, you will be the root of all your problems, fearing that they will not return the favours you have granted. It’s your only obligation to realize that you are the love of your destiny and accept the love you deserve.

Decide that you deserve true friendship, commitment, true and complete love with healthy and prosperous people. Then wait and see how much everything begins to change. Don’t waste time with people who are not worth it.

Change will give you the love, the esteem, happiness and the protection you deserve.”

And now it’s your turn: As a new program year begins in this “fourth wave” of Covid, what changes are you making to your career or personal relationships?

 

Read more, read better? Developing a reading habit with Stephen Cavan, Stephen Krashen and Brad Stulberg

When I teach students for whom English is a second (or foreign) language, they often express a desire to practice orally to help them become fluent as quickly as they can.

Less often, one will ask me what book titles I would recommend; when they do, they usually are interested in books on language skills (e.g. ESL textbooks), not books of fiction or poetry, written in English.

An advocate for reading by second language learners, my colleague (and a great ESL teacher, himself) Steve Cavan has recommended the writing of Dr. Stephen Krashen, an expert in theories of language acquisition and development.

Krashen has published hundreds of books and articles and given more than 500 lectures at universities world-wide to promote the “natural approach” to language teaching. By this he means to encourage students to read recreationally and for teachers like me (and administrators) to ensure that school libraries are well stocked.

Krashen says that “what is good for language development and literacy development is . . . pleasant [to] the acquirer and the teacher.” He has found that time spent free reading is more efficient for developing language skills than the equivalent time spent in traditional instruction.

Reading can (and should) be fun—and can help us learn new languages better.

So many readers and writers find life boring (even or especially in this digital age), when devices can leave us with minds feeling dry, uninspired, even cranky. What Krashen calls the “pleasure path” of reading often lighthearted fiction in a foreign language accelerates our learning of that language.

For instance, Krashen refers to one study in which new immigrants to the US who have progressed very slowly in learning English showed a remarkable spike in progress, due mainly to reading pleasant (potboiler) romance novels, such as the “Sweet Valley High” series. These students were not taking ESL classes at the time.

My colleague, Steve Cavan, has referred his students to free, online ebooks in English on the following site, where classics have been simplified to levels comprehensible to new learners:

https://english-e-reader.net/

Whether we are new to a language or native-speakers, however, reading deeply, what freelance writer and coach Brad Stulberg calls “full engagement in a book,” can be a joyous experience. When people’s attention spans are shortening by the day (or so it seems), Stulberg says that to be a deep reader “is also a competitive advantage in today’s knowledge-based economy.”

In a recent article in “Forbes” magazine, Stulberg argues that getting lost in a book “is good for the mind and spirit,” allows us to understand topics more deeply, to sustain attention for longer periods of time and to enhance our creativity.

Now, whether for non-English readers or the fully fluent, who would argue against all that?

Stulberg recommends six practices that can help us all read more and read better:

(1) Use a hardcopy book. Research shows that we understand and connect ideas better when we read physical (not digital) pages. There are fewer distractions than with digital media and our brains remember better knowledge acquired through “tactile experience.”

(2) Have no digital devices in the room. Even “the sight of these devices and everything they represent—not to mention the willpower it takes not to check them—is a huge distraction.  So find a non-tech room for reading.

(3) Read with a pencil, pen or highlighter. When we engage with books more deeply, actively responding to their ideas, we become more fully absorbed in the material, which improves our “associative thinking and subsequent creative insight.” (This will of course mean that you need to buy the book, which in time means you may wish to donate it to charities, through which others can benefit from it, too.)

(4) Keep a notebook nearby. Even when we’re closely engaged in a book, irrelevant thoughts can pop up in our minds (e.g. groceries to get; errands to run). Stulberg suggests that we right them down in a retraceable place, so that we can “off load [our] brains from trying to hang on to them.”

(5) Read for at least 30 minutes. Deep reading is similar to physical exercise. Our minds are muscles and need to be trained to read over a significant amount of time. Filling in brief moments of your day with an audiobook, though not terrible, cannot compare.

(6) Read as much as you can. Stulberg rightly says that “books are the best bargain there is” for sharing insights, wisdom and experience. As a professional coach who recommends reading, he has helped Olympic athletes to progress through life, post-sports; business founders through career-defining and challenging times; and has observed that wise leaders “from Bill Gates to Ruth Bader Ginsberg  . . . all read a heck of a lot.”

So why shouldn’t we, too? And that’s whether we are new to the English language or not.

 

And now it’s your turn. Do you practice deep reading in your professional or personal life? Has the thinking of Cavan, Krashen and Stulberg convinced you to get started?

Please share your experience. I’d be delighted to hear from you.

A creative response to a late pandemic world, by Tomos Roberts (“TomFoolery”)

In May, 2020, Tomos Roberts (aka “TomFoolery”), a spoken word poet based in the UK, wowed our Covid-stricken world by composing and performing “The Great Realization.” (I blogged on the performance, some 15 months ago.)

In that “pandemic poem,” Roberts argued that the earth-shattering effects of Covid-19 offered an unparalleled opportunity to appreciate what matters–from one’s family to the environment that groans from our abuse. Other narrative poems have followed, all featuring Tom’s trademark rhyming couplets and indomitable cheerfulness, which coexists with his awareness of the injustices that fill the news.

Shortly after the success of “The Great Realization” (which American actor Jake Gyllenhaal  promoted as a future children’s story), Tom encouraged the Covid-weary by delivering another poem, “The Inventor.” When Covid continues to wear on us and when so many of us lament the ongoing degradation of our earth, Tom’s speaker’s exchange with the cynical “inventor” (an authority figure and naysayer) may offer us insight and thereby hope:

“Sat in a chair, with a desk in the way, he’s looking at me looking like I know what to say.

What would you like to be, he unloads to the air, with his steely hard, unhelpful stare.

An inventor, I say, as I hold his eye, there’s a smirk across his face that doesn’t fail to pass me by. “An inventor,” he exclaims and then giggling repeats. “Do you have a new invention that this planet really needs?”

I’ve held my tongue for long enough, the effrontery’s too great, but calmly I stay smiling like I’m talking to a mate.

I’m sorry, I’m not here to pitch your product. I’m sure you couldn’t comprehend but if I were you I’d cool down a touch and try not to condescend.

I haven’t reinvented the light bulb, there’s plenty of people making phones. I don’t have a shiny gadget or an appliance for our homes.

No, I picture a new society. One of freedom, and of beauty, where people aren’t given menial positions and where every member knows their duty. I picture one in which rights and freedoms are afforded every soul, and not dependent on arbitrary factors but with a humanistic goal.

I picture a place without such structures, where only a tiny few can win–a place where we don’t oppress one another based upon pigmentation in our skin.

Maybe we could get to a place where health and education are free, since they’re things of incalculable value or at least that’s how it appears to me.

Maybe we could work less, as I see no reason why, if we had the technology available, anyone should toil until they die.

I picture one where leaders are chosen for diplomacy and not selected for brute power, one with structures of support for those that meet their darkest hour.

I picture a place where big business would be tasked with innovation and we instilled societal guidance to deter from domination. Competition is good. If it drives us to improve. But the utility doesn’t last long, if all the rest of us must lose.

I picture a place where dance and art and poetry can be held in high esteem, where children are encouraged to be creative, to imagine, and to dream. I can see you rolling your eyes at this but telling me it’s not true that imagination and creativity are things that robots just can’t do. A place where justice learns to operate without such human bias, that we can enjoy the gift of music, and the calm effect of quiet.

I believe that this is possible. I believe this is where we’re heading. I believe that this isn’t  fantasy or just a story that I’m telling.

I believe that I have a part to play and I believe that so do you.

I believe that by believing it becomes more likely to be true.

I believe there are those who will slow us, due to lack of wisdom or private gain.

I believe that it’ll be hard to create and even harder still to maintain.

I believe we’re in touching distance, of being so much greater, because life’s a game, and a game will always be so much bigger than the player.

I know you don’t believe it’s possible. I can see you shake your head. But you know, the only reason we don’t already live in that world is because we haven’t invented it yet.”

Listen to Tom perform this poem, himself:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LwpDiW8npmM

(c)  Tomos Roberts (TomFoolery)

And now it’s your turn:  Who is the “inventor” in your life, who challenges the value of your creativity, your inventiveness?  Could it be the pandemic, itself?

Please drop me a note; I’d be delighted to hear from you.