Entrepreneurial Wellness – Page 20 – Storytelling Communications

November 27, 2021November 28, 2021

On Finding Your Voice (with a nod to Seth Godin)

In these late pandemic days, many of us are feeling “Zoomed” out. It started in mid-2020, when colleagues started taking cough drops or dry mouth candies before entering conferences, group meetings or contract interviews.

More than a year later, many of us are tired of seeing ourselves and each other on video. Some have made light of the problem by adding flowers or pig-ear icons to their online images. People have blogged on the politics of turning off the “video” function off altogether–the politics of being seen, of being the object of another’s penetrating “gaze,” analyzed so exhaustively by academics in the 80s and 90s.

Marketing genius Seth Godin (who speaks to people across all divides of discipline, age, race, class, gender and more ) blogged recently that he’s concerned about our “actual voices”–that not enough of us are being heard:

“It’s pretty clear to me that our speaking voice is not the result of the inevitable physical evolution of our vocal cords. It’s something our brain figured out how to do with the part of our body that keeps us alive by breathing.

And because [in evolutionary terms] it’s a late addition, there are a bunch of kinks in the system . . . .

[Speaking involves] a huge number of sensitive muscles and nerves. . . . Add microphones, Zoom, and the high-stakes world of being seen, and you can start to understand why it’s so easy to get hoarse, to sound like someone you’re not, to develop tics, to amplify your stress, and a whole host of other challenges.

If you don’t sound like you, it might simply be because your brain is sabotaging the thing you’re trying to say. I used to riff about ‘no one gets talker’s block’ but now I’m not so sure. I think most of us do.“

In my recent months as an online ESL teacher, I’ve displaced some of my writing work (as a business writer) with teaching–which, of course, relies on my literal voice.

To facilitate daily talking online, I start most mornings by steaming my sinuses over scalding hot water; I run a humidifier at night and sometimes by day, to relieve my throat from our dry prairie air. I stay hydrated as much as I can, as well. These are all tried and true methods recommended by family doctors and vocal coaches, alike.

In Covid times, it’s harder to speak well in a climate where we rightly but paradoxically are masked in public (and sometimes in private), to keep us (including our voices) safe.

I still feel “talker’s block” some days, especially when a new student does not participate enough in our conversations–perhaps not feeling confident enough to risk making errors in English–when they want me to talk, to compensate for their insecurities. It’s far better for them to risk making mistakes, so I strive to build an online classroom that is safe for experimentation. But due to the seamy world of cyber-connectivity, we all generally feel we shouldn’t trust the folk we meet online.

When struggling with “literal” voice issues, Godin urges everyone “to find a good voice coach. Not because you’re some fancy keynote speaker about to go on the TED stage. Simply because you have something to say and it would be nice to be able to say it without pain. It’s easier than ever to have a few sessions remotely, and many people I know have found it life-changing. . . .

The world needs to hear from you.”

Speaking daily with students from such countries as Belarus, Ukraine, Iran, Japan and even to new immigrants to the US, I am struck by the diversity of their experiences and how much my mind is broadened by conversing with them. Andrea from Italy (a pseudonym) is a leading authority of Asian history who inspires me to find time to read the books he has, so that I can keep up with him! Jeanette (also a pseudonym) stays late at work some evenings to meet me on Zoom, when she shares her concern for minority human rights in her part of the globe.

The distinction that Godin makes between “literal” and figurative “voices” is erroneous and for the reason he unconsciously acknowledges when urging us to get voice coaching: “[Y]ou have something to say and it would be nice to be able to say it without pain.”

Not just because of the pandemic, but certainly due partly to it, we are living in some of the most pain-filled times our planet has seen. Very few people can speak of their lives or work without expressing at least some pain–even if it’s unconsciously (e.g. Godin’s reference to a false sense of self, verbal tics, etc.).

Such times demand that we find good listeners more than good vocal technique teachers, be they the literal audience of a TEDTalk (e.g. Simon Sinek speaks about empathy), a close friend or loved one, or a trustworthy psychotherapist. When we tell our stories to valued others, we may begin to heal. I named my business “Storytelling Communications” in part for this reason.

I believe that the world does hear from you, my colleagues, my students and others, when we find a way to give literal and figurative voice to our pain, instead of aiming to free ourselves from it. For centuries, human beings have called this process art.

I feel remarkably privileged now that I can work with entrepreneurial mentors, colleagues and friends; and most recently, with my ESL students, to hear and speak about pain (and other emotions, too).

Through teaching and writing, I feel that he world does hear from me–at least some of it. That happens as I facilitate others’ telling of their stories. The physical and psychological are interwoven. And this work matters.

Even if Zoom is the best way that it can happen.

October 31, 2021November 4, 2021

Local, everyday heroes: Meet Steve Cavan (ESL/EFL teacher extraordinaire)

As many of my readers know, at least one daily television newscast in Canada has long featured “local everyday heroes,” as a way to improve upon the often depressing and painful realities of world news. Starting this week, and on occasion, I want to introduce in this blog often unseen colleagues, contacts, and other entrepreneurs or artists in our community, who embody a “heroic” kind of decency in their daily lives.

But can the word “hero” or “heroic” have any integrity of meaning, at this time in history, you might ask. In his recent collection of interviews, Extraordinary Canadians, CBC journalist Peter Mansbridge defined the term “hero” as anyone who puts the needs of others before themselves. The book collects the stories of the bravery and service of some dozen Canadians, from all walks of life.

As you may recall, during early Covid times , I completed my certification to teach English as a Foreign (or Second) Language, through TEFL.org (based in Scotland). I discovered before the pandemic began how much I had missed learning foreign languages, since I stopped studying French and Spanish at the end of my undergraduate studies, more than 20 years ago.

Due to the long distances that separate English language learners around the world and teachers, like me (who also come from all over the globe), much ESL teaching now occurs online, using platforms like italki.com or Cambly.com (amongst numerous others). Of course, Covid has only intensified the need for online instruction, so platforms like Zoom and Skype are heavily used in language instruction.

Getting to know and use online teaching platforms, as a way to meet and teach students, is not for the faint-of-heart. There are often many functions of networks that are not self-explanatory; some trial-and-error is involved and teachers often worry about securing good rankings from their students, so as to sustain a strong flow of clients.

While my knowledge of English grammar was relatively good as a writer, editor and former graduate student of literature, I have learned more since becoming certified in ESL. Even so, English can be a messy language, at times, and I’m occasionally stumped by questions I encounter. At such times, having a mentor or advisor can be a God-send. It also breaks the isolation of Covid self-distancing to have someone available to discuss queries online.

Enter Steve Cavan, a professional ESL teacher on italki, who has taught himself linguistics and (over the years) English grammar to better help English language learners around the globe. Steve helps students improve their pronunciation in order to reduce the distortion caused by their accents and an ensuing lack of comprehensibility that often occurs for foreign speakers of English. Some of these students are training to teach English, themselves, in their own countries, or seek to learn it to advance their careers. And some go online sheerly out of personal interest.

Steve is known locally as the talented spouse of one of the University of Saskatchewan’s resident geniuses in the English Department, Professor Kathleen James-Cavan. Steve is brilliant in his own right (and was once accepted to do a doctorate in the UK, after earning Master’s degrees in philosophy and Classics in Southern Ontario). I would include his photo in this posting, but that would fly in the face of his modesty.

Steve has taught extensively Greek and Roman Classics, history and writing for non-Arts majors, amongst other disciplines, for St. Thomas More College at the U of S. To read more about his remarkable (and varied) career, please read my book, Keep Going: Five Creatives Build Resilience, which is available here: www.storytellingcommunications.ca/books

I know Steve best as an interviewee in that book, where I discussed his resilience in developing and operating (as chief brewmaster) Paddock Wood Brewery (PWB). Steve pioneered craft beer brewing in Saskatchewan, long before it became the popular industry it is now. He started PWB in 1995 and operated it for more than 20 years, through choppy waters that included outdated government policies, operational challenges and more.

One of his colleagues, Stephen Ross, writes this about Steve Cavan’s work:

“Steve is a professional in all his business dealings, and his contagious passion and dedication to craft brewing drive all his decisions. I had no hesitation in partnering with Steve, or in following his lead in groundbreaking small market brewing in Canada. Under Steve’s direction Paddock Wood has grown from a small pilot project to Saskatchewan’s first and only microbrewery, with multi-provincial distribution.”

Dozens of popular microbreweries that now dot Saskatchewan’s landscape owe virtually everything they can do to Steve’s pioneering work.

He has achieved similar success with his more recent business idea, of teaching ESL, one-on-one, to students internationally. He works on the Chinese network italki, as I now do, with his encouragement. Steve is one of the platform’s highest ranked English teachers and has built a following of students from South America, Russia and elsewhere–countries where time zone differences from Saskatoon are manageable.

But what makes Steve a “local, everyday hero” is his willingness to share with a new teacher, like me, and with all of his students, the finer points of grammar, usage and even the italki platform.

He could easily roll out a training program and charge a high fee for subscribers. (Many entrepreneurs do.) But Steve scrupulously refuses to do so. He reads, teaches and writes, quietly and modestly, passing incognito through much of both our academic and entrepreneurial communities.

So I hope you’ll join me in raising a glass–perhaps of one of the fine beers that he once pioneered at Paddock Wood– to toast Steve Cavan as one of Saskatchewan’s amazing local heroes. He is a teacher with a passion for learning, educating and helping others. Although he would resist the term “hero,” his generosity with and compassion for others, along with his commitment to excellence, make him a true exemplar of the word.

October 4, 2021October 6, 2021

On learning to breathe again, with Dr. Andrew Weil and Thich Nhat Hanh

Seventeen months into this worldwide pandemic (if we consider it to have begun in March of 2020) and the world is very stressed. Even if we could bracket off the imminent collapse of our hospital system in Saskatchewan, under the strain of the fourth wave of the Delta variant, everyone who’s honest will admit to feelings of anxiety, exhaustion, burn-out or even panic. These words have passed nearly everyone’s lips, whether to describe their own state of mind or that of their loved ones.

Evidence-based policies and the need for earlier interventions (lockdowns) went ignored by some provincial governments.

Some eligible adults continue to refuse vaccination, while kids under the age of 12 do not yet have that choice and are falling ill. ICU nurses must attend inadequately to two or even three patients at once, whereas in non-Covid times, s/he’d have only one. Daily case counts on the day of writing have reached nearly 500, in Saskatoon alone. Five or more patients in our still relatively small city are dying, daily.

The province is seeing per capita a rate of new cases more than three times the national average; and a death rate of four times that. Important surgeries have been postponed; organ donation suspended. People are lonely and dealing—or dying—with their fears and worries, alone.

And, as medical science tells us, the surge will not end soon.

Those of us who heeded medical science and sought full vaccination continue to follow Covid protocol (masking up, keeping to small bubbles, etc.) while our government refuses to reinstate a much needed lockdown.

Some Covid patients, who are lucky enough to be successfully treated and discharged, must use oxygen at home. As one CBC story detailed, they “have to learn to breathe again.” The province of Ontario has developed a home oxygen therapy program for patients, post-discharge, since their recovery continues for months (or longer) after leaving the hospital.

But those of us who do not contract Covid and so do not need oxygen therapy, also need to remember—or to learn for the first time—how to B-R-E-A-T-H-E.

Integrative Medicine Specialist, Dr. Andrew Weil, who leads the “Center for Integrative Medicine” at the University of Arizona, advocates for the 4-7-8 breathing technique–a simple, efficient exercise that can be done anywhere, in any physical position (although sitting with one’s back straight is best to facilitate air flow).

During a particularly chaotic day for me, recently, I returned to my practice of this exercise and found, within five or six minutes, a noticeably calming effect. The exercise can be done in public spaces (e.g. doctor’s offices, public transit, before public presentations, etc.), although then one might inhibit the “whooshing” sounds of exhalation that Weil recommends.

If you haven’t tried this particular exercise, please try it to deal with pandemic life! Here are its five, simple steps:

Place the tip of your tongue against the ridge of tissue that lies just behind your upper front teeth and keep it there for the duration of the exercise.
Close your mouth and inhale through your nose to the mental count of four.
Hold your breath for a count of seven.
Exhale completely through your mouth, making a whoosh sound to a count of eight. This is one breath.
Inhale again and repeat the cycle three more times for a total of four breaths.

Weil writes that the tip of one’s tongue should stay in position the whole time and that “exhalation should take twice as long as inhalation. The absolute time you spend on each phase is not important; the ratio of 4:7:8 is important.”

If you’re unaccustomed to breathing deeply and holding your breath, Weil recommends speeding up the exercise, until your strength increases, but keeping to the ratio of 4:7:8 over three cycles.

The goal is to “slow [breathing] down and get used to inhaling and exhaling more and more deeply.”

Of course, this American “physician to the stars” has popularized breathing practices that stem from centuries-old Buddhism. Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh, on whom I have blogged in the past, observes something important for our crisis ridden world: “Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor.”

Feelings and even this pandemic, will pass (or eventually so). What we can control is how we cope with these things–for which there is no better strategy than breathing.

For further information, including videos of breathing exercises by Weil, and healthy diet and eating that counters inflammation and upset, see his website: https://www.drweil.com/health-wellness/body-mind-spirit/stress-anxiety/breathing-three-exercises/

And now it’s your turn. Are you breathing deeply through these trying times? Please share your best practices on my “contact” page. I’ll breathe easier by hearing from you!

September 21, 2021September 21, 2021

Tomos Roberts (Tomfoolery) on the world’s need for better leaders and how art reflects that need

As many Canadians watched last evening, Canadians elected another minority parliament with Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

While watching the polls and listening to all of the politicians’ speeches, I was reminded of a recent spoken word poem from the UK’s Tomos Roberts. Referred to as “Dear World Leaders,” it calls for leaders on our planet to address the dearth of wisdom, insight and ethics so commonly in the news–and to value the arts and artists, as vehicles to communicate those values.

Critics can easily charge Roberts’ (aka Tomfoolery’s) poetry with being idealistic. But he makes a grounded appeal for political leaders to find better vision and demonstrate a greater commitment to ethics than most do.

“Dear World Leaders:

I know your job isn’t easy, and the pressures immense, as you navigate uncertain, unfolding events.

You ask us to stay in our homes and put on our masks. Well, I come to you now with the simplest of asks.

Just encourage us. Look back through the archives—the most famous of speeches. Shakespeare’s Henry the Fifth, Churchill’s “Fighting on the Beaches,” Martin’s Dream of the children with skin black and white, in a world hand-in-hand who would play and not fight.

They sprung verse from adversity through world movements and war. They used words that when spoken helped the hopeless’ wings to soar.

Right now, these are the speeches that we so need to hear. So our goosebumps stand up and we’re roused from our fear. Look, you can tell us of cases, ‘til we’re blue in the faces. We all know the dangers, but the whole human race is, in this moment, confronted with the very same foe.

And you were chosen to guide us all through the unknown, so we hang on your message when things slip and decline. Connected only by screen, we share statements online. But we’re stuck on one narrative and it’s always alarmist. So a word to the wise: don’t discourage the artists.

We need the creativity of people more than ever right now. Call upon them to reforge the old stories of how–we inspire the youth and look after the old, or bring peace to the tired, as they shoulder their load.

Look, if you’re an elected world leader then that surely implies we need more than polite please to “just stay inside.” It’s so disheartening to feel like these words are in vain, when such talented people are told to retrain.

You have dancers, comedians, poets galore. There are actors, musicians, filmmakers and more.

And while key workers are working themselves to the bone, and when weary and drained they must find their way home. What words of encouragement ring out in their minds, what strength for tomorrow do you want them to find?

We need plays to be written and songs to be sung, we need solidarity now so we might overcome.

It’s an emergency but not just the medical kind; ‘cause it pervades through our spirits, our hearts and our minds.

Where’s the passionate speeches that I have not heard, to encourage gives courage—that’s why it’s part of the word.

The last thing I want you to hear in this rhyme is that one day together we’ll look back at this time.

We will collectively mourn those the virus has taken. There’ll be businesses broken and livelihoods shaken. But I’d wager right now that our spark will return and those embers will ignite a new beacon that burns.

But what of you, I do ask. What will your legacy be? What will the history books read; what will you want us to see? Inspire us now and we’ll remember your name. We’ll remember how you answered the call when it came.

Kids will quote you in essays, as they remember this strife, we’ll make toasts to your word; they’ll make films of your life.

So the gauntlet is laid, take it up, if you dare: with intelligence, empathy, wisdom and care.

Just give us something to cling to; encouraging words we may heed.

I hope you’ll be that world leader; that’s the world leader we need.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXKT04MGIzo

September 6, 2021September 12, 2021

On Wanting to Change–a Meditation on Entrepreneurship from Brianna Wiest

In 2020, Anthony Hopkins received an Oscar nomination for his role in “The Father,” as a man with dementia struggling for control with his daughter, played by Olivia Colman. (The film was featured at the Toronto International Film Festival last year.) Hopkins commented that the film was his personal favourite, following astonishing performances in such earlier films as “The Remains of the Day” and “Silence of the Lambs.”

Hopkins himself has been diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome and in an interview with the CBC”s Tom Power (during TIFF) spoke with characteristic humility about the film and about aging.

https://www.cbc.ca/listen/live-radio/1-50-q/clip/15797845-anthony-hopkins-the-father-challenges-growing-older

Over the last few years, the essay I post below has been attributed to him.

Like so much on social media, the attribution is incorrect. (As readers well know, over the years powerful epigraphs have been misattributed all over the internet. For instance, I remember several associated with the Dalai Lama which were not his, and that only scratches the surface.) Snopes.com attributes the essay associated with Hopkins to writer Brianna Wiest:

(https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/anthony-hopkins-let-go/)

While we could debate the problems of misattributed writing forever (remember when it was new to question Shakespeare’s authorship?), Wiest’s essay warrants reading, especially given the attention recently devoted to the role of boundaries in entrepreneurial relationships. The essay speaks (allegorically) to those and not only to romantic relationships. It could better be called, “On Wanting to Change.”

“I Need This In My Life” (Brianna Wiest)

′′Let go [of] the people who are not prepared to love you. This is the hardest thing you will have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing. Stop having hard conversations with people who don’t want change.

Stop showing up for people who have no interest in your presence. I know your instinct is to do everything to earn the appreciation of those around you, but it’s a boost that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.

When you begin to fight for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you in this place. This doesn’t mean you need to change what you are, it means you should let go of the people who aren’t ready to accompany you.

If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you don’t do yourself a favor by continuing to offer your energy and your life. The truth is that you are not for everyone and not everyone is for you.

That’s what makes it so special when you meet people who reciprocate love. You will know how precious you are.

The more time you spend trying to make yourself loved by someone who is unable to, the more time you waste depriving yourself of the possibility of this connection to someone else.

There are billions of people on this planet and many of them will meet with you at your level of interest and commitment.

The more you stay involved with people who use you as a pillow, a background option or a therapist for emotional healing, the longer you stay away from the community you want.

Maybe if you stop showing up, you won’t be wanted. Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship will end. Maybe if you stop texting, your phone will stay dark for weeks. That doesn’t mean you ruined the relationship, it means the only thing holding it back was the energy that only you gave to keep it. This is not love, it’s attachment. It’s wanting to give a chance to those who don’t deserve it. You deserve so much, there are people who should not be in your life.

The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy, and both are limited.

When you give your time and energy, it will define your existence.

When you realize this, you begin to understand why you are so anxious when you spend time with people, in activities, places or situations that don’t suit you and shouldn’t be around you, your energy is stolen.

You will begin to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and for everyone around you is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else. Make your life a safe haven, in which only ‘compatible′ people are allowed.

You are not responsible for saving anyone. You are not responsible for convincing them to improve. It’s not your work to exist for people and give your life to them! If you feel bad, if you feel compelled, you will be the root of all your problems, fearing that they will not return the favours you have granted. It’s your only obligation to realize that you are the love of your destiny and accept the love you deserve.

Decide that you deserve true friendship, commitment, true and complete love with healthy and prosperous people. Then wait and see how much everything begins to change. Don’t waste time with people who are not worth it.

Change will give you the love, the esteem, happiness and the protection you deserve.”

And now it’s your turn: As a new program year begins in this “fourth wave” of Covid, what changes are you making to your career or personal relationships?