May 2024 Vol 6 Issue 5
Tell Your Story Newsletter (TYSN):
Specializing in Entrepreneurial Storytelling
Let us help you tell your story!
Welcome Mid-May 2024!
As I prepare this issue of “Tell Your Story Newsletter,” the delicious rain that fell last week in Saskatoon has caused trees, bushes and plants to “green up” beautifully.
And with the milder weather, we can again wear barefeet in sandals (woo hoo!). And our days continue to lengthen (the sun setting at nearly 9 pm, now), which means more patio and backyard time!
Cue Gershwin, “Summer-time, and the living is easy!”
I’m planning a visit to Patterson Gardens, as soon as the splendour of our flowering fruit and lilac trees unfurls. . . And how about a trip to a local greenhouse to admire (and select) a few annuals and plants?
In Article One of this month’s newsletter, I visit some surprising truths about how pauses and interruptions not only allow for, but also help, good conversation.
And in “Storytellers’ Corner,” I visit the work of British etymologist Susan Dent on quirky words, both from other cultures and from Britain.
May this late spring and forthcoming summer bring you JOY through time in nature and among family and friends; and through renewed health and growth, after another Prairie winter.
And may prosperity also greet you, valued readers.
Thank you for reading another issue of “Tell Your Story Newsletter,” now more than 13 years in production!
Sincerely,
Elizabeth
Principal
Storytelling Communications
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IN THIS ISSUE:
ARTICLE 1: When can pauses and interruptions help good conversation? Writers from “The Economist” weigh in . . . .
STORYTELLERS’ CORNER:
Some quirky words in English–from Susie Dent
SHOP NEWS
ABOUT US
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Article One: When can pauses and interruptions help good conversation? Writers from “The Economist” weigh in . . . .
Before the Pandemic, “The Economist’s” collective of writers who compose under the name of Samuel “Johnson,” wrote an article on how verbal ticks and routine interruptions are “lubricants to conversation, not killers.”
Many of us strive to eliminate “um” and “uh” from our professional speaking, right? Consider Canadian PM Justin Trudeau before and after he received formal speech training. But recent analysis of human conversation practices show that minor words (e.g. “mm-hmm” and “uh-huh”) provide important pauses that are vital to good conversation.
Learners of English (especially English as a Second Language), take note!
The “Johnson” writers begin with the case of British PM (c. 1980s), Margaret Thatcher, a politician “known for a voice that brooked no disagreement.” Thatcher took elocution lessons to sound more forceful when she led Britain’s Opposition.
However, even after she became PM (1979-1990), she often used interruptions in the interviews she gave. Researchers who studied clips from the early 80s discovered that most often, “those hearing [her] interrupted phrases” [“um,” “uh,” “mm-hmm,” “uh-huh”], including her interviewers, “thought that the prime minister was ending her conversational turn.” Most often, then, those interrupting her were not (as we might assume now) rude or domineering.
What explains pauses and interruptions in speech? The Australian linguist, Nick Enfield, discovered that humans abide by a linguistic rule called “no gap, no overlap,” in which people instinctively react to the end of another’s conversational turn by beginning their own, in about 200 milliseconds (the “time it takes a sprinter to respond to a starting gun”).
This is more interesting when we consider that it takes about three times as long (600 milliseconds) for a speaker to plan what they are going to say, by cognitively retrieving the words and organizing how they will use them.
People must then plan to begin responding well before their conversation partner has stopped (be it Margaret Thatcher or Mr. Bean). This requires “fine attention to the cues signalling the end of a turn, such as a lengthening of syllables and a drop in pitch,” Enfield says.
Not coincidentally, using a downward shift in pitch is frequently encouraged from speakers who want to sound more authoritative (as Thatcher did). Clips show she repeatedly dropped her pitch when she predicted an interruption.
21st-century business communicators (like yours truly) are often urged not to listen with the intention only of responding, instead of first (more empathetically) perceiving the speaker’s meaning and intention. But linguists like Enfield have found the boundary between listening and responding is more complex than that practice would have it.
And contrary to the assumption that speech patterns will vary between cultures, Enfield found that dynamics of human conversation are “similar from culture to culture,” from both major to minor languages and from rich to poor countries, throughout history.
For instance, the pattern of “no gap, no overlap” applies to ethnicities in ways that defy cultural concepts (or stereotypes). For instance, in contemporary Japan, speakers who are thought to be polite allow one of the shortest gaps before starting to reply: “In answering ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to a question,” Enfield says, “the Japanese, on average, . . . reply before the questioner’s turn is over.”
He argues that this is not rudeness, but a practice that keeps the conversation flowing. Each speaker helps the other: words we might consider to be mindless throat-clearing (or verbal tics), such as “uh,” “um,” “mm-hmm” and “uh-huh” in fact “signal to the other speaker [listener] that a turn is not quite finished, that the speaker is planning something more. This makes sense only in the light of the split-second timing with which speakers take turns.”
Paradoxically, if there is “no gap” between turn-taking, there will be no “overlap.” The conversation will flow better and both speakers feel recognized and heard.
The “Johnson” writers note that men are more likely to use “pause-fillers” (esp. “uh-huh”) than women are (although women favour “mm-hmm”), and speculate that this may result from men’s eagerness to “hold the floor.”
Enfield refers to research from past decades, including one experiment where several speakers “were asked to tell about a near-death experience, while listeners were given a distracting task, like pressing a button every time the speaker used a word starting with ‘I.’ ”
As a result, the listener was less able to encourage the speaker with “mm-hmms,” without which the speakers felt unable to cope: “[The speakers] paused more [and] used more ‘um’ and ‘uh’ themselves, and repeated the dramatic lines of their stories, desperate for affirmation” that they’d been understood and appreciated.
The “Johnson” writers note that Roman statesman and philosopher Cicero (1st C., BCE) was not the first to record “rules of conversation, which included taking turns and not going on too long.”
In fact, such rules have been discovered in many cultures long before Cicero’s. The “Johnson” writers say such rules may be part of “shared social instincts” among early humans, and “a product of evolution” over millennia.
The “Johnson” writers observe that the next time you find yourself pinned at a networking event by “a bulldozer or a bore,” know that they are more to be pitied than despised,” the “Johnson” writers conclude: Such speakers “are lacking a basic human skill” or capacity for relation. They efface not just “gap” and /or “overlap” but altogether the very identity of their listeners.
The “Johnson” writers conclude that conversation is fascinating not because it is hard to achieve, “but [for] how well people subconsciously cooperate to make it seem easy.”
And like many human skills, sharing conversation with others improves with practice: “If you don’t use it, you lose it.”
And now it’s your turn: How have you noticed “no gap, no overlap” in formal conversation with others?
Could we re-write our social expectations for silence between shared conversation?
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| STORYTELLERS’ CORNER . . . . |
STORYTELLERS’ CORNER
This month: Quirky words–some from abroad and
some “home-grown”– in English
Perhaps it’s the result of recent efforts to reduce my professional library that I happened upon some quirky etymology during my reading.
British lexicographer and etymologist, Susie Dent, has shared many complex words on YouTube.
She reminds us that the English language has borrowed words from countries all over the world—some with recognizable names and some, not. Here are three examples:
- “Tsundoku,” from Japanese, is “the act of buying yet another book that you fully intend to read, but never quite get around to” (beware, you buyers at used book stores and fairs this spring and summer!)
- “Shampoo” has origins in Hindi where “campo” means to “press” or “squeeze.” Originally, getting one’s hair cleaned involved heavy massaging and pounding of the flesh—affecting both the head and the hair that grew on it! . . . British and European colonialists took these treatments (and fragrant soaps and lathers) back “home,” where they were passed down through the ages.
- “Ketchup” is based on a Chinese word, “Ke-chiap” for a brine of pickled fish that was taken from Vietnam to China and then altered by the British until it became the tomato sauce that (centuries later) dominates supermarket shelves in the Western world!
Some words may originate in the UK, but are happily onomatopoeic, and which Dent collected in one of her recent books, Roots of Happiness:100 Words for Joy and Hope. This is a book for children intended to bring beauty and fun to them during Pandemic times.
Examples from it are “mubble-fubbles,” for feeling down or depressed.
Also, “thunderplump” refers to the “sudden downpour of fat, heavy raindrops that leaves us drenched and dripping in minutes” (more often a UK than a Canadian Prairie commonplace).
What “weird words” are floating in your office, mind or family? Please write in; I’d be delighted to share them in a future issue
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SHOP NEWS:
Last night (the evening of May 15th) was an especially joyous one, as Women Entrepreneurs of Saskatchewan (WESK) gathered for their annual awards banquet.
Awards were given for “Community Involvement” to Andrea Crittenden; “Indigenous Entrepreneur Award” to Destinee Peter; “Innovation Award” to Chelsea Stewart; “Growth & Expansion Award” to Maegan Mason and Cari Thiele; and “Resilience Award” to my colleague, Jolene Watson
Congratulations to all recipients and to all nominees!
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WESK’s “Achievement Award” was given to veteran communications leader (and one of my first freelance clients, back in 2011), the amazing Adele Buettner, who shared 10 of her best tips for entrepreneurial success.
Congratulations to all of the women attendees, nominees as well as winners; award sponsors, and to WESK’s board, staff and planning committee, all whose hands-on effort made the gala the best it’s ever been!
Thank you to all of them!
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Thank you to Joanne Fogarty ( Director of Employment & Learning) and Josephine Mensah (Employment Counsellor), YWCA, who hosted a recent job fair for newcomers to Saskatoon, where I discussed opportunities for newcomers’ language classes in Saskatoon.
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Thank you to my IT specialist, Jordon, for again discussing subtle tech matters with me, despite the many demands that cover his metaphorical desk!
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Thank you to Jolene Watson for referring me to Linda’s Printing, whose high-quality business cards and marketing materials have earned them admiration and plenty of clients!
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Alongside copywriter, journalist and creative writer, Ashleigh Mattern, I thoroughly enjoyed walking through the opening morning of “Gather,” Saskatoon’s second farmers’ market, on May 4th at River Landing.
“Gather” features local farmers’ meat, dairy (and this summer—fresh fruit and veg), as well as international cuisine, local jewellery, candles and soaps. It was reminiscent of “The Forks” (in Winnipeg) and the “Eau Claire” market in Calgary.
Vendors were just getting started on the 4th, but the atmosphere was generous and friendly.
Several restaurants and food trucks had scrumptious looking (and fragrant) cuisine. The market’s products are not intended to be low-priced, but to build local businesses who work so long and hard for our community.
Gather’s atmosphere is pleasant to immerse oneself in, especially with summer on the horizon!
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This issue of TYSN is dedicated to Edward (Ted) Gilroy, an extraordinary man with entrepreneurial instincts who lived, laughed and loved fully in his nearly 100 years.
My childhood would not have been the same without his stories and jokes. My deepest condolences to his widow and sons. I am the better for having known him and share in his family’s sorrow.
Rest in Peace, “Uncle Ted.”
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ABOUT US:
Between 2011 and December 2018, Elizabeth Shih Communications chronicled the stories of B2B marketing and communications on the Prairies and across the country.
Effective January 1, 2019, I rebranded as “Storytelling Communications.” I now help new and economic immigrants to get better jobs or secure more contracts by improving their language skills. And I also write and edit the legacy stories of major companies.
Interested in learning more? Please contact me through my CASL-compliant website (www.elizabethshih.com).
After I receive your message, I’ll be pleased to discuss projects with you!
Please visit my website for more information (www.storytellingcommunications.ca).